If you’re heading into the weekend, dreading the next 2 weeks of exams and final papers, you can rest easy knowing you’re still better at life than I am.  At the VERY least, your luck is about 6,7859,282 times better than mine. Realistically speaking, my luck can only be compared to this guy right here —->

How does this shit happen. I mean really. You kind of joke about it with a friend, or maybe you’ve seen it in a movie or TV show, but real life?

I’m sitting at school working on a paper, decide to go grab some food  I figure, you know what, I’m gonna be a nice guy and grab my friend some food as well. She asks me to grab her a hot dog; ketchup, mustard, the works.  Sure, no problem, it’ll take an extra 30 seconds out of my day.

So I trek across campus (all 200 feet of it) to the only place that sells half decent food.  The kind of food that wont stop your heart after the first hobbit sized bite, or send you into cardiac arrest. I proceed to order my wrap, and her hot dog.  While I’m waiting for my food I see the girl, who’s supposed to be working the cash machine, run off with the box that is meant to hold the hot dog, totally normal… About a minute later she comes back, her co-worker hands me the box, and my wrap.

Head over to the condiments, open up the hot dog box and find a note written under the lid “Thanks for being hot <3” insert stupid smile on my face, then move about 2.6 seconds forward to the moment I’m about to put mustard on the hot dog, anddd BOOM. If you haven’t figured it out yet, that “BOOM” was  the sound of the mustard machine exploding. I may as well have showered in it.  Did I mention I was in a white shirt? Or that I was standing in the middle of the only restaurant (if you can call it that) in school?

I spent the next 6 hours walking around school looking like the neglected love child of the red and green Teletubby